Say it out loud: I’M struggling

I’m struggling. 

Sometimes, you just need to say it out loud. 

As January draws to a close, I could write another upbeat and tool-focused positive psychology post about goal setting and mindset etc, etc. 

However, I think the best thing that I can offer is empathy.

 Today, I said to my husband, I am struggling.

I have a lot of things taking up my mind and my heart, that are not my stories to tell, but are weighing heavily on me. 

I had a good cry and admitted that I have been hanging on by a thread for a while now. 

My usual support of seeing my besties for a catch up and a few gins has gone. I’m missing a time when we could download the week, have a cry, a rant but more often a huge belly laugh at the ridiculousness of it all. This has turned into a quick dog walk in the woods or a snatched Zoom Call. 

Belting out worship (badly) on a Sunday morning at my amazing local church, with the coffee, prayer and chat after the service, has been replaced by Zoom. it is not the same in your own kitchen, however hard the people there are doing everything they can to make it as similar as they can.

I could go on about the things that are missing, but I know that you all get it, because you have your own lists too. You have your own support that is not there anymore. 

I always turn to work when I feel most like this. Work has always been my saving grace, I can get lost in it and I love helping other people. I always feel better after a productive day coaching or writing courses.

 However, I can also hide in it. 

Today, I chose not to. 

Today I chose my vulnerability and amazing things have happened. 

I have gained understanding from my family. I have shown that saying. “I’m struggling” does not make you dissolve in a heap;

it is a release. 

I don’t want, need or deserve sympathy, I just needed to hear, ‘I see you’ and “I know, I’m finding it hard too”. 

As I put the words out into the world, I received a beautiful card through the post, from someone that I don’t know very well but have admired for a long time. It was a beautiful letter of encouragement and a request that I find time to ‘refresh ‘myself. This beautiful person had no idea that I was struggling but put into words the things I needed to  hear most, because she had sensed it from afar before I had even admitted it to myself, with this quote: 

“ A generous person will prosper; whoever refreshes others will be refreshed” 

(Proverbs 11:25) 

A simple verse that allowed me to continue on with my day feeling seen and heard and continuing the work of refreshing others. 

Thank you Anne. 

If you are struggling today, don’t hide. 

Tell someone. 

Come and join us over on our Facebook group; Headstart to Happiness”. 

We will make sure that you are seen and heard. 

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